it hasn't hit me that college is over yet. so far at home, i haven't brushed my teeth, taken off my makeup, or changed clothes before bed.
i barfeds in our rink
I have no memory of puking on someone. Was he cute?
I'm taking child development now so if you get pregnant i can raise your child no worries
The line was so long at Kum n Go some guy opened & drank 2 beers from his 12 pack while waiting.
remind me in the morning to get the random kid out of the closet and to clean the pudding off the wall
I miss waking up knowing you're passed out under my bed.
they bet me shots that I couldn't give people piggyback rides around the club just cause I'm 125lbs and a girl...I had a line forming after the third guy.
The office pool is up to $500 if you take a shit in Frank's desk drawer. Time to change the unpaid internship into a cash cow.
They're pole dancing on a handicap sign post.
It was honestly the most delicious alcohol I've ever drank, plus the added risk of going blind from methanol poisoning really enhanced the experience.
I'll always remember 2012 as the year I hooked up with countless girls who had the sides of their heads shaved.
So what exactly does one do when my driver gets a DUI and is now arrested and I'm still hiding in the trunk?
My doctor actually said I was suffering from an "acute hangover" in doctor's note I asked him for....what a douche
You act like tequila is some sort of sex juice
Randomize