"Worlds Wildest Videos" should be called "Crazy White People"
he asked me if i had ever jacked off high and then referred to it as a "man-to-man question"
just heard some guy walking down the street say "butt sex in the sun"
go get him tiger.
yeah so our basement was flooded 4 feet. we just smoke and drank and then went swimming. gotta make the best out of it
I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
Any parent would be proud to have a daughter that's a blowjob fairy
That's science, my friend. Boner science.
After a couple hours you decided you were going to walk home but ten minutes later you called and said you'd puked by the side of the road and you needed us to drive you to the art museum.
At least you got some premium homework time. Still drinking vodka from a coffee cup?
I switched to water. When the numbers get blurry you are no longer being productive.
I resisted the temptation to hold the cake in one hand to alternate bites with the ruffles I was eating. I decided that might make me look dysfunctional.
RE-DICK-YOU-LUSSSSS
That's me emphasizing the ridiculous
Just gave my thesis presentation, pretty sure I made out with the admissions woman last night.
They way I see it is I've wasted 7 years of having these glorious tits. I only have about 3 good years left before idk kids or just gravity takes over and they don't look this nice so it's basically open season.
I mean, if there was a version of you with a penis, you'd fuck it...right? Like just outta curiosity at least
I just want him to get into an accident where he's horribly disfigured but otherwise fine so he's not so freaking handsome
Randomize