just did a line in a complete hula outfit off a chick in a devil costume. do you think hell will be this good?
5 years of college and never once did they teach us how to respond when you overhear a group of 7th grade boys who are in your class talking about how you're definitely DTF
children are so perceptive these days... and horny
i can't believe i had my finger in that
I wonder sometimes what your vagina thinks about you.
She told me I had to leave by four. We fucked until six thirty and we are the champions played on the way home. Yeah god knew
everytime someone would look at you, you started to try and deep throat your beer bottle.
Somewhere during foreplay he said something about me only being with two other guys... I just went with it cause we have never had that conversation...
Now accepting hypotheses about how i managed to get a bruise between my boobs....
I totally OverDed on K2 last night. I felt like I was made of lead and then I had a panic attack.
I have three different pairs of earrings at three different houses including your 16 year old brothers nightstand. Look at my life. Look at my choices
He told me he wished he could shrink down to a small size so he could live inside my cleavage
Ive never seen a drunk man get suplexed before last week, now its the standard requirement every time we go out.
Hopefully they won't bring up last year's Christmas party. I kind of predicted my great aunt's death...
The only words we could get out of him as he stared catatonically into space were "Everyone I know and love is dead"
Our conversation went from you choking me to my quarter life crisis reeeaaalllll quick.
Randomize
