On imdb the canadians say It's amazing
whats a more ladylike way to say "fuck me on your lunch break"?
It was like fucking a house. Down the chimney. That deep and empty.
You always know it is going to end badly when a guy asks if he met you at a "coed naked lawn bowling party"
I feel like somebody took my brain out. Stomped on it with cleats. And then put it back together with a glue stick. Thank you.
The problem with never associating with your roommate is that you never know if they're dead in their room with the door closed or just gone for the weekend...I sprayed some febreeze just in case.
You're the third person who's asked me for an afternoon blow connection in one day. Unreal.
That's more of a you-issue than a me-issue
Well am going to a strip club before sun down, I dont think anything good can come from that.
I'm really hot. went tanning and this cheeseburger shirt like isn't breathable
I made him dress me after we fucked. He put me in TMNT pants and then told me I looked hot.
I just did shots of fireball with my dad in a car wash. How's your pregaming going?
Hooked up with a straight guy while dressed as a man. I'm unstoppable.
On the bright side, only one more day until we aren't sober anymore.
it was a hallmark card with butt plugs.
Last night when we were having sex he put the condom on backwards the first time. While he was putting the second one on I blew up the first one, made it into a balloon and hit him in the head with it. I think we're over the honeymoon stage.
Randomize
