Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
Is making out on a toilet while he is sitting down and pissing weird? cause that's what happened last night
There is now a Twilight themed dildo. What do YOU want for christmas??
Her sex list was a LOT longer than mine. She tried to justify it by saying '4 of those don't count because they were in the gang bang'.
We tried to play doctor all sexually then he was taking down my 'symptoms' I said I needed to puke he thought it was part of the game
While I was fucking her, they came in and served us both weed from a hookah. best. friends. ever.
Can you bring me a pair of sunglasses to the bathroom please... Don't judge me.
I had to close one eye to read the questions on my final this morning. That hungover.
Going to the hospital for stitches on my balls. Mom walked in on me manscaping with an electric razor. Tell NOBODY.
She didn't need to know her brother was thrown out of a bar for getting head on the dance floor. You're a shit head.
I don't know how I'm going to know it's her, I only know what she looks like with a wig on
SHE COULD ALREADY BE HERE AND I WOULDN'T EVEN KNOW
Please tell me you're not home alone watching Glitter.
Can you see in?
But I thought it was so funny last night
You also thought you were a gypsy mermaid last night
I stole $10 from the guy I hooked up with last night.Not sure why but it was definitely more satisfying.
i could have got laid, but instead, i threw up in her hair. you can cross that off the bucket list.
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