I'm saving my limes so I'll know how many drinks I've had.
I do the same thing, but I use ice cubes.
Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
escape the fate? dumbest band name ever. how about escape the fart. now that is a show i would go see!
I think i just got paid for sex with a hot pocket... and i accepted
so i say "rick dont build that sandcastle" and he "says ok i wont" then i wake up and its sandcastle fucking city all over my apartment
Apparently you can coat check a keg.
walking back to the dorm.. she is flashing evryone, demanding beads. we tried to stop her and now she just keeps yelling "Bourbon st bitchesss"... you get her tomorrow
I was going to ask the people in the kitchen to keep the volume down, but they're cooking pasta at 3 AM and one complimented me on my polka-dot nightgown. They're high. No volume control.
Start warming up your vocal cords, because Fucking With The Windows Open season has arrived.
Ps we ordered a pizza at the pool today and I dropped the entire thing in the pool. We still ate it. #canthang
So I just bought e from my sophomore home ec teacher. How's your weekend going?
Hatred of squirrels is the least of my hereditary problems.
You should frame my arrest warrant.
You left your Xanax bottle in my car. Why is the label all smudged?
I spilled wine on it.
Just fell down the stairs..might wanna call the ambulance jus take the weed out of my pocket be4 they come..
Randomize
