I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
you kept screaming that dicks were growing out of your back and then you started crying cause they were so far from your vag
could you get any more awkward?
we're making bets on your personal life
wow, you never really realize how many muscles you have in your crotch until you pull them all.
Ok fuckface listen up and listen good. 1.calling dibs on a chick out of your league is like applying for a job with a highlight video 2. dont fucking ski down the stairs again 3. if you do, put it on your highlight video
It felt as i were a pad of butter melting onto a piece of toast.
I've already made the "blackout on move in day" decision
So. I need to gloat. I couldn't exactly tell my family that I won this game by deep throating.
He goes to Columbia so regardless of how he looks I should fuck him right?
Its not often you get to say, "The security guard at my job is my new drug dealer," but as of last night, I get to say it.
I can't believe you're forcing me to handle this hangover sober
Please don't finger me like a jackhammer. I'm a woman not a construction site.
I mean, I already hooked up with her boyfriend. The least I can do is accept her facebook friend request.
Note to self, the correct response when a guy tells you he likes you as a person is not "ew"
dude, totally just walked home...using pizza as gloves
Randomize
