So i decided to deal with the awkwardness of last night by making out with all three of them
if another girl says "im usually cleaner down there" I'm just going to shoot myself
so I made out with a lobbyist last night. im officially a resident of D.C
If the blowjob was before the wedding, we're not technically related, right?
I was chocking and even did the sign for it..And you continued to just laugh
Sorry I pissed in your dining room and kicked your best friend in the face while he was passed out.
Sent him a picture of my pregnant boobs from last year, think he'll notice the difference?
The guy who was The Count on Sesame Street died this week too. Therefore, you should take multiple shots, count them, & go "ahh aaahh aaaahhh" after each one. I expect video...
Who wrote "the chamber of secrets has been open, enemies of the heir beware" across my bathroom wall?
Showed up 15 minutes late and curtsied when I entered the door if that puts perspective to how my first day is going
My RA just sigh me high as fuck acting like a zombie and scratching at my door. Thoughts?
I'm playing trivia and drinking margaritas so now is not a good time.
Your youporn search history says otherwise.
You call it sex. I call it penis conditioning.
THEY WILL NOT STOP FLINGING CARDS AROUND THE ROOM! It has been four hours. HOW CAN IT STILL BE ENTERTAINING?!?! I will be under the table if you need me.
Randomize
