TXT her NOW! The phone is actually IN her Va-Jay-Jay!!
I just woke up to crumpled tissues everywhere. Looks like it was another night filled with tears and semen.
wrong asian. never thought that would happen.
He promised he'd be the first bidder on my ebay item if i went home with him. Worth it.
And by "got a tattoo" i mean i got a tattoo in the dorm bathrooms with a guy using his cousin's tattoo gun.
He set an alarm on my phone to an infant screaming and puking to make sure i take my pill. its working.
And I can say one thing, I look pretty good in high wasted pants. I don't know if that helps. But I do. God I'm high.
yeah well, its not like my astrogynecology class is teaching me what i need to know
im almost 90% sure there is no such thing as astrogynecology.
Only you could go on vacation to visit family and hook up with a pro NFL player from Tinder
Halfway through missionary I realized I was partially laying on his sleeping dog and idk that just kinda ruined it for me sooo
You used his ass cheeks to demonstrate how to play the bongos and he still called you the next day. That's true love.
when i woke up with 300+ messages I didn't except them to be about coyotes and burning shoes.
I was not drunk enough for that final.
I had to cum in my sink.
Our sex sesh was interrupted by a bunch of hobos fighting outside his apartment.
Randomize