And I just remember seeing him for the first time and being like, who is this ape of a man? Like legit he could be the missing link
Well It's time to grow up anyways, right? Now that you're graduated and have a job you can't drink uncontrollably
No. Now that I'm graduated I can drink uncontrollably at nicer bars
i officially have more pictures of his dick than pictures of us together
It's been a long time since I felt this bad on a Monday... and for that, I thank you.
the higher we get, the more he looks like ray charles.
I've been at work 30 min broke a paper towel holder a chair set a box on fire and fell down twice. Hungover Brian just reached a new level
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
I just hooked up with the same bartender my dad cheated on my mom with in the 90s. Not sure how this makes me feel.
family traditions my good sir
Just checked in with my friend who walked in on us. He thinks you two had a spiritual connection and he's bugging out
He was also rolling face on molly so his perception of divinity might be slightly off
There should be a Doritos delivery van or something.
You came in last night, ate an entire avocado in silence, and then told me I should never accept rides from strangers. Not sure I even want to know what happened to you last night!
You shouted “im bobby labonte!” In the process of shoutgunning a beer. He said you were too redneck for him...
Its official, kitchen-couch is my favorite.
You passed out again didn't you?
its likely that this occurred.
FYI brushing your teeth & taking off your makeup does not erase the shame from the night before
The text I got from my boyfriend this morning: "babe, I'm not mad because I know you were drunk, but you kissed 3 guys last night and I wasn't one of them".
Randomize
