your head's too prwtty to be stuck in the books
i think ur clone was at the club last week. she slapped some tall girl in the face who tried to steal her spot on the podium. i dont know if ur like her, but she seemd like a ninja badass with superpowers
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
I've got my laundry in the car, tonights 1 night stand pre-req is an in suite washer and dryer. Let's do this!
No i peed with you in the toilet. The guy I high fived was mid pee in front of the urinal
of course not. I do my best teaching on a hungover monday. I did the research. im still okay with the direction in which my life is headed.
She just hopped out of the car at a red light to pet the baby Jesus in the nativity scene.
Not worth it.
He has a lot of emotional energy invested in your vagina.
90 seconds of pumping and 2 months of bragging all summer. So much for my reputation here.
Step 1: chug a red bull vodka with no ice Step 2: chase that with a shot of wild turkey Step 3: chase that with a shot of tequila
Step 4: your drunk
There is a video recording of my birth. I have seen it. It is terrifying.
This is a long quiet interstate without somebody to sext.
Just got thrown out of the club for making condom water balloons. I'm not ashamed.
I'll give you some leg action but I'm not showing you anything else until your penis admits it loves me
She pulled out a water gun filled with vodka and called it her weapon of choice tonight. She's fine.
Randomize
