need another drink. this is the easiest way
if I could go back to kindergarten and not fuck up my life, I so would.
So what if i ate it off the ground. Its like i found a five dollar bill just laying there, in burrito form.
How unacceptable would it be to bar hop with a funnel in the square? It's Halloweekend and I plan on going hard. I can claim it goes w/ my costume. But I don't think the MIMITW uses funnels.
As the night goes on these shots are getting so much easier. My liver jst needed a warmup lap.
Youll thank me when youre dead an dont have a cat eating your face
James is trying to butt-heads with a moose. I don't know whether I should stop him or just sit back and watch where this goes.
God dammit not the cupcake channel. Not when I'm high.
I'm going to miss hockey season. It was the best excuse to get drunk on a Tuesday night.
He told me I was "too flexible." Excuse me?
I gave you keys to my house and drugs. This must mean we're in a relationship.
She unfriended me four minutes after we fucked. That must be some sort of record.
Oh man. I am high, watching The Office and getting pancakes. What a country.
FYI telling a guy that you're glad his dick isn't big after giving him a bj, is NOT a compliment.
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
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