after he passed out we removed everything electronic from his room, stuck in some old books and an ancient typewriter from goodwill. for 20 min. we had him convinced he'd drunk himself backward in time.
we were fucking and all I could think about is how my silly bands were glowing in the dark.
Just walk-of-shame'd past fifteen little girls at summer camp. Take a good look girls, I am you in twelve years.
Dude they are all farmers and I'm pretty sure there's a prostitute here.
We had to coat check the pizza.
Miller High Life will be the death of me. Well, that and shower sex.
You know you have crossed to the dark side of marriage when a nap is more important than jacking off
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
I really don't think there's anything more liberating than farting.in a loud bar where no one.can.hear you
Stop studying come to the bar get drunk and help me figure out how to get home pretend there are commas in there someplace
Im so glad I make morally wrong decisions. It's like the best worst thing I've ever done.
I'm determined to sit on that face.
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
Hey did you take a shower last night at like 4am?
"ummm...." (Thinking in my head) wet towel, soaking wet hair, clean pjs on backwards... "that would make more sense then what I thought happened..."
He screamed, "Let there be light!" when he came
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