Yeah things got weird. You ate an entire bag of hotdog buns, then tried to catch a tree on fire with a candle.
Maybe not, but you have to admit watching him get hit by the car was gratifying
Woke up with his dick on the side of my face, it's like he passed out mid-mushroom stamp.
That's all? I'm a pro at gay chicken. I'll touch his dick, I have no problem with that.
That place is a DUI and an STD waiting to happen. I think I'll pass.
Dear Penis Owner...our records show that you are overdue for servicing...please contact our friendly associates to schedule a thoroughly satisfying experience today...operators are standing by...
I will take a blow job from a dude that kinda looks like a girl at this point
It's fucking New Year's. I can be soberish in 2013 after tonight. It's like the 30 years of grey area between Jesus' birth and death.
Never have i felt more judged than when i was throwing up in front of a hello kitty shower curtain at 5 in the morn
you told the police officer you wanted to be just like her one day but not a lesbian
You grabbed my dick don't call me son
i just swapped my iPhone for a happy meal. this is greg btw, the hooker let me borrow her phone
He was a foot taller than me and my hands were bigger than his, it's called Pity head
Maybe the "i killed someone" and "tequila makes my clothes come off" comments freaked him out.
Santi's no longer allowed to buy booze in my lane. Last thing I need is a midlife crisis looking at his Id again.
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