I don't remember what your face looks like..
I don't remember your face either, just your dick.
The little things make me happy. Little dicks do not.
I don't know. I guess at the end of the day I wanted taco bell more than a boyfriend.
Totally get that.
he went up stairs with nothing on but calvin klein's and an eskimo hat, said hi to her dad, got a doughnut, and left like it was an everyday thing
I just ate four packages of Swiss Rolls. Being high and on food stamps is AHmazing.
Can u please come get me. My car keys are gone. Somehow I ended up sleeping in my trunk
just watched my roommates get stoned and jury rig a pulley system to pass the bowl back and forth across the room.
I'm venturing to your corner of this sin house in t minus 2 minutes.
Screw them and thier engaged asses. I've got liquor to drink and boys I don't know to make out with.
I mean, unless you wanna just let me lie there while you fuck me and pour water into my mouth
I could probably be laying here naked and he'd still be more interested in this thunderstorm
His girlfriend left him for the pizza guy. I am not fucking kidding.
I'm glad you had fun with your genitals.
Pretty sure I have a sex related back injury. I'm not sure if I should be proud or ashamed.
We were on the beach when you spilled sand in the bottle and said "relax it's vodka, it'll disinfect itself"
Randomize
