I learned to sign I want to be on you today
Score
Deaf chicks here I come
You guys need to stop introducing me as "the girl you shared"
Vaginas are confusing as hell with all their secret compartments and shit.
I'll get my vaginal cartography poster.
i was surprised by the severity of his small dick condition
It was awkward being the only one at the wedding who knows that the bride and groom met when she gave him a lap dance at a strip club
WHITE RUSSIAN WEDNESDAY. TELL YOUR CO WORKERS. INVITE QND PREPARE
I just power puked in the office bathroom.. blew blood vessels in my eyes and now I'm ready for a donut.... success
Pagan metal show. There is a folk dance happening in the mosh pit. Also, I have no idea where we are.
In bathroom. Hand in air with cell phone. Help.
Being the hot sister definately has advantages, I'm pretty sure I ruined her engagement
Well I've made a drinking game out of the Wiggles but I think I've got this babysitting thing down
think before you get married my friend it's my birthday and just got done jacking off
shut up and let me use my vagina as a weapon of self destruction in peace!
my very deepest apologies for the unintentional cock block.
I woke up with leftover chocolate syrup on my nipples. WTF happened last night??
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