I just got a facebook invite to join a group called "bring back the old franzia spout." i never want our generation to grow up.
Go for the frenulum. Its like eating a popsicle. They go nuts with that shit.
Ok see being that I'm not present or participating your vague texts "neeeeed that" and "vagina" leave a lot to question.
We were showing our tits to everyone because it's breast cancer awareness month and we care deeply
I thought we were doing it cause it's Tuesday
Someone was asleep on the couch next to us and woke up. We paused and he yelled "gentlemen, behold! Sex!"
my mom found me passed out in the kitchen floor with the Brita pitcher.. Happy Mothers Day
Bud light lime after 12 shots of vladdy is like frolickin in a meadow of sweet flavor
Trying to coordinate a drug deal while taking a psych test is not easy.
I got stoned and explored ice caves with a guy who photographs dildos for a living. I win.
I was fed cake in bed and then was pinned down and ridden till I came. And then fed more cake. I'm going to marry Brad. I'll put money on it.
You bring me burritos. Of course I text you during sex
Was the guy in the cowboy hat kinda hot or have I just not had sex in a really long time?
NO. NONE OF THAT. SHAME ON YOU.
I'm drunkenly throwing popcorn at a spider, fuck him. Why does his scary 8 legs get to be happy?
if anyone breaks out the olive oil & slip n slide, text me 911.
Randomize
