I just fell for a fake 50 dollar bill in a urinal. Fuck pittsburgh
let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
She swallowed my jizz and then took a shot of jack daniels and said "chaser." This cant be real life.
Dont have access to internet. masturbating to shake weight commercial.
I feel if a girl leaves my house the next morning feeling degraded and in desparate need of a shower, then I have succeeded.
He has a tattoo of a carebear. This is not happening.
they told me they were banning four lokos so yeah i did have to buy 42 of them
well other than the faint smell of fireworks in the truck you can't really tell the windshield was exploded
Ive seen him cuddling a giant inflatable seahorse. Nothing could be creepier than that.
Nearly got hit by a blue bell ice cream truck. Can I count on you to make plenty of puns like "her life was sweet, and so was her death" at my funeral if that was to happen?
What's the address and code again...does anyone need anything and why is my viking helmet on the bed?
Soggy bong water carpet is the worst kind of carpet.
Sexting and pancakes... It's going to be hard to top that
she just punched him in the balls in front of everyone and yelled "YOU SEE WHAT YOU MADE ME DO"
It was some weird herd predator-evasion instinct. All 15 of us took off running in different directions, and the two cops just stood there, perplexed. They had no idea who to chase.
Randomize
