At my boss' house at a bbq. Had a few beers. Taking a poop - there's no TP...this is my nightmare.
where am i from again
i woke up in the lobby of Holiday Inn on a chair sitting up straight
Speaking of morons, I just found half a Subway sandwich in the bathroom drawer You or your brother?
well once we started drinking vodka out of wine glasses there was no turning back
You fell out of your barstool, I tried to help you but you said if I got any closer I'd be drinking my meals through a straw, So there you sat.
We found him sitting in a beach chair in the basement storage room passed out. Idk if we should move him or pass the bowl around.
I planned on emotionally scarring him for life this weekend. DAMN YOU PERIOD!
And then, I saw the prophecy come to fruition. It was the Dick of Destiny.
Either your boy toy or the kid who pulled a knife on me in high school is here
The last thing I remember was naked hot tub and taking a shot and using the hot tub water as a chaser. Not acceptable.
It's 11:13am and my chem prof is drinking a beer in class. I guess finals week is stressful for them too
I love when groups of boys part so I can walk through. It's like a red sea of penises, and I am their Moses.
He seems like a super lonely dude. I bet if I gave him a picture of my tits he wouldn't make me turn in this paper.
My Sexting was not on an AP level
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