i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
You can now add 30,000 feet to the places where I have puked
i just got so high i needed a buddy system to the kitchen
When we ran out of red solo cups we switched to Starbucks cups for beer pong... Who doesn't want to live in Seattle?
I just got a bj @ my old preschool...my childhood memories r all ruined
I feel like this whole "telling that guy i have a kid to avoid him" thing is getting out of hand..
How so?
Probably at the point when i told him i was "Too drunk to drive" and "had to pick up my kid" all in a span of like 2 hours.
Dude I was fucking my girl on the couch and her dog came up and licked my balls. Does that mean we just had a threesome?
Any parent would be proud to have a daughter that's a blowjob fairy
Also...you were trying to touch his balls without him noticing
Ihop lady gave me free pancakes for being sober this time
I just heard a 350 lb guy with a stutter describe getting blood in his eye as he was shanking his cellmate and, more generally, how to survive as a white guy in jail.\n\nYou should really consider going to some AA meetings
He visits one Denver strip club and now hes moving there
This is where you say "Why yes we will drink with reckless abandon and hopefully not be in a church parking lot again."
Finding that toy duck there was weird right?
My concierge just asked me to his place for dinner while I was signing for a delivery. The delivery was a box of vibrators. Let's discuss.
I will read books by day and do guys by night. A mental and physical enlightenment, if you will.
Randomize