The last thing I remeber was convincing you to hide in the fridge, and then taking everything out and you not fitting.
Went home with a 29 year old from the bar. Life lesson: 9 year olds stay up late sometimes
Iiiiiii almost fall ib the lake
We had one of those mutual "I know your on a dating website, I won't tell if you won't" glances.
He noticed there was ketchup on his shirt and took it off. Noticed there were people there and put it back on. Then he saw the ketchup again. He must have taken his shirt on and off about 6 times
i just opened a seperate checking account to keep track of how much i make and spend on our keggers
im honestly just eating salsa and looking at his penis
Okay. We're coming naked. We need Saran wrap and plastic forks.
At least I can pee in a cup like a champ at this point
Just an FYI if we break up I'm going to sleep with your cousin or who ever my dealer is.
Is it completely inappropriate to base my morning after pill purchase on if they sell coffee or not?
Currently looking up Winnie-the-Pooh porn.
No dude shes like 5 feet tall and maybe 100 pounds... Normally i wouldnt be scared but someone gave her a bat. Thats why im in the bathroom
why the hell did we go to a rave last night?
we didn't?
definitely went to a bar with strobe lights
JENNIFER. You passed out in a toilet with a color changing light in it.
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
Randomize
