The pirates hijacked 3 more ships today!!
we need a boat to join in
Obama is on top of it we'd get killed within mins, but we'd live in legend foreva
Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
Went to use to bathroom and walked in on karaoke. Two girls singing "a whole new world" to each other in the shower. I'm gonna miss this place in the summer
Apparently I had an idea for a cooking show and then proceeded to throw cookies at people.
so some random man just messaged me on facebook "tig ol bitties" should i be concerned?
I think I've officially made out with the entire starbucks staff.
So did u puke in his bathroom or all over his Olympic medals? Please say medals...
He bought me dinner. He gave me his jacket when I was cold. And then ate me out in the passenger sear of the car.
I just peed in a flower pot on the veranda while crying and holding a drink
I spent the whole party making out with some guy. He wasn't that cute but six of my sorority sisters are fighting over him so I had to do something..
Are we sharing a room, or can I pack my vibrator?
Yes to both. We'll use the workout rotation from dorm life.
Yea I saw a friend of yours carrying your limp body somewhere
I just heard a 350 lb guy with a stutter describe getting blood in his eye as he was shanking his cellmate and, more generally, how to survive as a white guy in jail.\n\nYou should really consider going to some AA meetings
His condition for us having sex was that I wore my show boots. #equestrianproblems
Somehow I went from sitting in a car upside down to waking up in the grass surounded by paramedics. It was a great night.
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