Why must guys tell girls who are a little bigger that "they like a girl with meat on her bones?" Yeah needless to say he went home alone
Literally just as i started to cum the church bells next ot my house began to ring. either it was the most epic timing ever or god was watching and congratulating me
i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
I should have some sort of frequent buyer card or something. I just bought my third bottle of Captain this week. It's Wednesday.
And I'm PMSing. So if I'm not crying, I'm masturbating.
I'm genuinely dissapointed that we didn't make any fat chicks cry
I held a cracker & gaterade down for an hour. I feel like this will be my greatest accomplishment of the day.
The thumbs up barstamp on my hand is mocking my hangover with its positivity.
I threw up for like 20 hours. Im gonna be the DD for the next 5 years.
Your biggest crisis right now is that you can't decide whether to keep hooking up with AN NFL PLAYER or try to rekindle your relationship with your ex. You are a walking white girl problem.
I just googled "creative ways to tell someone you'll give them a blow job". I'm losing my touch.
I've never SEEN someone give negative fucks before. It's actually rather impressive. I want to study under them.
Okay I'm ready to show you that my weiner still works
Too late, I'm convinced it's broken
I told her I'd rather set my hair on fire than sleep with her again. In retrospect, that was probably too harsh. My eye is still swollen shut.
I'm in the upstairs bathroom. I went to the bathroom after class and realized this is not a shit I want to have publicly. I ran home. We can go to lunch, just give me a min
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