oh my she just said cum sticks to her dentures so when she blows if they let her she takes them out
It's 3am, i just got back from ht e bars and registered for classes larteeeeee. History of baseball at 8am? at least ill meet the only stragiht gusy at NYU!
It'd be like medium rare by now.
I love how we're talking about your vagina like it's a piece of meat.
Is snow just God skeeting all over the place??
Yes. Yes it is.
Well I almost walked away with an Irish guy's boarding pass and some south guy's dignity
This football player keeps talking about his drunk dad. I think he may start crying. Does this deserve a roll tide?
I had to watch them play Salty Cracker. I have never seen a grown man cry with a boner before
How did "late lunch" turn into 8 solid hours of drinking??? I feel like death.
You know I love you. I just don't love your penis.
Leaving my wallet at work and not going out to drink tonight...SIGN FROM THE UNIVERSE.
Ok, they now been on the roof for two days. I can see 4 cases of teecate and a carton of smokes. They are yelling at "fucking fall" and pissing off the roof.
one of these days i'm gonna do a sparkly magical girl transformation into snoop dogg
I haven't reeked of cheap beer and poor decisions in months. I officially hate adult life.
He smacked my ass so hard my ass cheek looks like Wilson from Cast Away
You were making out w/ur brothers coach against a door when someone opened it and you both fell through... Then you continued to make out on the ground
Randomize
