okay serious question, the water is shut off in your house, do you attempt and use the clean toilet water for your new bong?
so after morning sex, she rolled a joint and turned on sports center
you might have found the rare bro goddess. i thought they were myth
We need to start having sex underwater more often.
I just sneezed alcohol in a candle and started a fire.
sooo... you have no idea who nailed their tubesocks to my wall?
He's hinting that I'm starting to be kicked out of their blunt rides, I can feel it.
Dude. 21 days till I'm 21. It's the 21 day countdown. The 25 days of Christmas can suck my dick.
You woke up, laughed, proceeded to throw up on me and then passed out again.
I'm 25 and I shit my bed last night. And I'm telling you about it. Not sure which is worse
I wore home his HoHoHo boxers. I've never felt such a connection to an article of clothing.
I planned to shave today but it's Friday the 13th I might cut something
apparently in the middle of sex, i said "i just really love the food network i watch it every day"
I'm trying to secure Christmas dick. Idgaf if he has strep or not.
I just ordered a five person drink for myself.... Right about now you should start saving me from myself....
death, taxes, and me drunk texting you are 3 certainties in life
Randomize
