i am exhausted. it's been years. we both know his dick is small. the jig is up.
For some reason I have a hard time believing getting drunk and recreating a movie about singing transvestites is ever very far from a situation you're in.
And I'm ok with his balls touching my ass
Woke up under the lifeguard stand sleeping next to mitch our homeless friend. I bartered a summer wardrobe for his last 5 dollar to buy a bfast sandwich. Bring clothes
When did you hit me on the head with a stool?
you were exchanging tortilla chips with the guy at the next table, telling him your table was given the "big chips" because it was your 21st birthday
Sry I came all over your dress. Think of it as a Vegas souvenir.
There are cops on horseback in our back yard
I'm just mad because I can't play gta5 all day tomorrow cuz I'll be in court testifying against a craigslist prostitute...
His penis looked like how I would imagine Satan's pinky finger.
Though I do have to question why i found you and my brother passed out on his bedroom floor, no clothing between you except his tie wrapped around your dick
Something I can get at drive through, boobs out, don't want to get out of the car
Hope you are okay. You were running down the street with shopping cart at one point and yelling "bitches aint shit!"
I went from swearing off of sex to planning a threesome. It's been a rollercoaster of a day.
If it were up to me his wife would never get his penis again, but I guess they have some sort of arrangement
Yes, an arrangement called marriage
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