..Thats also how I think I got the lyrics from MIAs Paper Planes Sharpeed on my ass? Maybe.
it was 6 in the morning, and you cried until i put mulan in. then you proceeded to say every word, not to mention sing along... stop drinking.
she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
is it sad that I can recall my outfits by who took them off?
I think I just inadvertently started a sex competition with my roommate and her boyfriend.
At least in the future when we're all real people we can laugh about the time we all had scabies together?
God I love incriminating evidence...wonder what the statue of limitations is on shitting on someones driveway
Just got outta the drunk tank! Happy 21st birthday!
I screamed so bad because I thought he was going for my sandwich forgetting it was in my hand
I really have to stop having sex with people I sell drugs to...it feels unprofessional
I decided not to look up the nudes, because I believe that there is a line, and that mocking my old classmate's horrid nudes alone crosses that line.
I love him about as much as I'd love fucking myself with a cactus.
we had to follow your trail of clothes to find you.......
So I was walking to the bathroom and some random dude threw up while walking towards me. He kept eye contact the entire time and didn't stop moving.
I'm going to blow a ton of money on sex toys just so I can tell you to do better than them.
Randomize
