he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
Sometimes I wonder why I hang out with you. And then you show up half naked at my door with a half gal of vodka, and I remember why.
u got into a flexing contest with a dude in bathroom in the mirror at the club
He kept telling me that something was trying to enter this dimension from another universe through his spine...
U were yelling that I wasn't generous or supportive. Then you kneeled and said this weird prayer about the windows and doors of your life.
I don't see how I managed to fuck up so much shit in an hour and a half..
I cancelled the entertainment for your b-day party.... Keep the bouncy castle just in case.
My homemade mace ate through its aluminum container. I make awesome mace.
I am just glad I was home to catch most of it, cause it smells BAD.
I'm not a scientist but that could be because it's homemade mace. That is however just a hypothesis
It was like a square peg in a round hole... I've never seen one shaped like a stick of butter...
are you just sitting in your hotel room drinking popsicle vodka?
.....well anything sounds bad when you say it like THAT
I'll give you some choices for what to get me for Christmas. 1.You naked. 2.You naked 3.You naked.
new dating motto: let your guard down, not your panties
I showed my cat the amount of coke I had. She looked concerned.
May the power of my ass compel you!!
There we go, I shall begin my attempt to achieve whore status today
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