I think I kinda wanna bone that ginger from Harry Potter.
You literally just made my flesh crawl.
This is how scared I get when I ride roller coasters. And how scared I was when I had to poop when I had herpes.
she requested me as her brother on facebook.... biggest. letdown. ever.
Most likely. calling 911 isnt usually something i do the first time i hang out w. someone, but hey. its a good story now.
all i could think about while he was eating me out was how pretty his eyelashes were
Do I need to take a photo of my sister's enlarged and disgustingly dark nipples to scare you into protection? DO I?
I don't understand how these people can do extreme gymnastics and I have problems walking up the stairs.
I mean, I love her. But not "I'll have a threesome with her." Type of love.
Either you got hacked or we need to have a serious discussion about sending penis enlargement emails to your straight friends and why you shouldn't. It sends the wrong message.
I'm seriously considering refraining from drinking on school nights.
I like how you say that with 4 school days left of the school year..
she's sitting there like the lesbian godfather. A cigarette in one hand and a titty in the other.
When I wake up, please remind me why my shoe is in the toilet, my shower is filled with jello, and there is a naked girl sleeping on my coffee table holding a bag of Cheetos. that is all.
These beer shits have taken over my entire life.
You started pulling out condoms from your fanny pack and threw them at all the couples on the beach
My saturday night consisted of sewing my Halloween costume and watching Blues Clues
You actually...sewed your costume?
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