So there's dick imprints in the peanut butter
Yes, that was me on the jumbo tron. No, i don't know why i was hiding.
My lips are red and swollen. Solid proof that giving head is a viable alternative to lipstick and plumper.
until he told me my vag was like a juicy apple and he loved eating it, yes, i really did think we were both sober.
Don't talk about his dick. That's mine. There's a copyright on it. Use with permission
Has anyone ever told you you're majestic like a sea turtle when you fuck?
And your cock privileges have been revoked.
He recognized me by my ass from about 15 yards away. I must have a REALLY nice ass.
The number of times I've puked in the Walgreens bathroom is becoming way too many for my pride.
Wow. I feel like a bad friend. My fuckbuddy wished you a happy birthday before I did. The reality of that just hit me.
DONT YOU DARE DIE YET THERE IS SO MUCH SEX TO BE HAD
I heard you coughing. Are you choking or smoking? And are you okay?
My mother is even happier about me having a sugar daddy than I am
Only you could successfully troll for dick at a Hillel bake sale.
Let's be honest dude, you almost cried when I gave you a handy, you are not ready for a relationship, I knew this.
I didn't know I was invited to an orgy.
Randomize
