it will be a sad day when drinking racks of keystone isnt socially acceptable anymore
aparently i pased my english final. I don't even remember taking it.
Played "Which Couple Will Take Me Home Tonight" at the bar last night... I can now cross three-some off my bucket list
I passed out on the floor of a truck stop. Drinking binge 2011 is now over.
The nursing school interview showed me a picture of my passed out during your party. They asked if this was a frquent thing. I told them you drugged me.
Woke up next to a tiki torch spooning a plastic flamingo on a welcome mat i've never seen before with a "happy valentines day" balloon tied to my wrist, oh yeah and "i am a cougar" is written on my chest in sharpee and all the kitchen furniture is upside down...
I'll reiterate. Best drinking game ever. I shall teach it to my children's children
But you've got to admit , for how blackout I was I look fucking unreal in those pictures
I had to sit there with his three fat aunts talking about a bunch of 50 Shades knockoff books.
I felt like a taxi, but my meter was running up minutes he would be eating me out that night.
I'm having post-experience "why didn't I fuck her in a public bathroom" regrets
Shit my boyfriend's roommate thinks thinks: I love getting woken up to the sound of my roommate getting a blowjob
I just wanna have sex and go to Denny's after is that too much to ask for.
wanna see your best friend chug a bottle of steak sauce?
please go to sleep
He asked me while we were fishing why the passion was gone when we have sex. It's official...I am the dude in this relationship.
now acid just makes me think of crab ragoon
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