Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
i would give spencer pratt a bj just so i could bite his dick off
he'd just find a way to get more famous from being a eunich.
Penelope Cruz needs to learn American words.
let's skip the party, and just play drunken wii, again. its time to give my vag a break.
Could you explain why there is an Australian passport in your toilet?
Apparently faking a threesome isn't as much fun as you'd think
you just kept yelling NO BUENO SENOR at the cashier and throwing coins at him, of course you were going to get kicked out of the grocery store
This is a great bar, except you can't even randomly burst into song without them assuming you're drunk and cutting you off.
I just used my VA prescription bottle of xanax to get a military discount at the liquor store. I win.
Only you could get away with that.
why does CNN give a flying $@*# about the royal baby so, so much?
i hope they name him Joffrey
I'm not into beards but apparently my vagina is.
Vasectomy results are in. No swimmers in the water. REPEAT. No swimmers in the water. Come help me harness my new found super-power
Any idea why my ass cheeks are bruised again?
The fact that theyre bruised AGAIN means you're not adult enough to know why.
I was at his place until 2am. We just sat really close an stared at each other. I think you are right. Germans must not have feelings. Not even tingly ones in their pants.
So... I sharted on the plane. It was hard to maintain my composure and acted offended at the same time. I hate you for not cutting me off last night.
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