Oh My! A car just drove by me a splashed me with a wave of water. I am drenched and soaking wet!
I am sorry--all I heard is that you are wet.
OMG MY MOM JUST ASKED IF I WAS GETTING PAP SMEAR TOMORROW VERY LOUDLY WHILE WE ARE STANDING IN A VERY PUBLIC LINE.
I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
Men with bald spots should not have mohawks. Just in case you didn't know.
Going to get tested monday. You're coming with. Bonding time, slut style.
States back in the final four. Now our sunday night drinking has purpose. Sparty on baby.
Giving the kids Children's Claritin and calling it candy.....Is it setting them up for drug abuse later?
BAHHAHHAHHAHAHHA SOME ASS IS BIYING NE DRHBKS. DRUBK
This hurricane better not stop me from sitting on the stoop thurs & enjoying all the slutty costume walkofshamers
so serious though like its almost like I'm playing a game that's my life and Im always losing
Pretty sure I just noped a member of the Canadian women's hockey team on Tinder.
Tell him to put up or shut up. Can't be dangling dick in front of ho's without delivering.
It's just disrespectful
Bruh why you gotta judge
You're awake at 3:30 in the morning RSVPing to a musical, I'm well within my means
I know its 2 in the morning and everything. But i just straight up yelled "DON'T YOU UNDERSTAND THIS WORLD IS DIFFICULT ENOUGH AS IT IS WITHOUT YOU PULLING THIS BULLSHIT ON ME" to my taco. Because it fell apart on me. I think i might be cracking under this finals pressure.
I woke up, topless, my car was parked funny so I threw on my hoodieto go fix it and found a jello shot in my pocket. where did I go last night?!
Randomize
