Take your time, they're doing body shots off the dog.
her and i fucked to a michael jackson song and she had it memorized so she squealed every time he did
I'm drunk at the doctor. It's not that fun. Overrated in fact.
She got a text from her mom saying "you better not sleep with him, we all know how he is". IV ONLY BEEN HERE A WEEK
We had to go visit his dealer in the hospital to buy some weed.
Who's nuvaring is under my pillow?
He paid the bartender with money from the tip jar then proceeded to hit on me in front of my date. I love frat dances
It was one of the greatest weekends of my life. And that's even after factoring in spraying myself in the face with the bidet.
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
I'm gonna celebrate Valentines day by watching Bob Ross videos and tripping balls.
I think that's the first time I had "ass rimming" scroll across my phone at work
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
I took the beard trimmer to my balls this morning.\nMuch blood. Much blood from my scrotum.
What can i say, my face is nice and my body is just unreal. And my beer pouring/stealing is incredible \n
He's such a jerk. If only his penis was attached to someone else
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