ever had your bank call you to verify the 4 seperate bar transactions from the night before? I have
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
Homecoming wouldn't be the same without all the drunk old people puking on the street.
he kept doing his monologue, "if a vagina could talk."
I feel like the only solution to this is to get naked and lay in the shower for a hour then see what my penis wants to do.
We were confused who drove until we went outside and her cupholders were torn out of the dash and laying on the ground
What time did you start drinking?
Maybe.
Maybe isn't a time...
BTW waking up to a picture of you taking a shot of what I can only assume was shitty lukewarm liquor out of a blow up dolls butt made my day
Trumps. I've been wiping my ass with fast food napkins for 3 days.
Stalker pic that shit
He left, I think he got uncomfortable when I started singing 'oompah oompah doodley do, I have a special riddle for you'
After getting all 4 of my wisdom teeth removed I asked my dentist how much better would I be at head
It's like those toothpaste commercials where 4 out of 5 dentists would recommend your vagina
Christ I forgot how flexible you need to be for a decent sext pic. Jesus.
How did the surgery go?
My face feels like a marshmallow.
Just watched a guy open his car door, puke, close it, and resume driving. Happy Monday.
Randomize
