Its not small because its small, Its small because it was cold outside
True Life: I hate vaginal excretions
i cleaned out my closet and found 7 beers from 2007. ive had 3 so far.
so my doctor just swabbed my throat, and he looked up in suprise when i had no gag reflex. yea, he just judged me.
She has her iPod in her ears slippers and sweats on and is walking around the house up and down the stairs getting "exercise" she just stopped for a water break
I have shoes on. No pants. And my jacket pockets are full of ketchup and grass. Yes. Good night.
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
i was staring at it trying to desperately see a vagina
So many people have lost their virginity on my futon... I think it is only the right thing to bronze it and put it on display
luckily my workout playlist doubles as a masturbation playlist.
Why is there a water bottle full of red wine on my desk this morning?
See you tonight.
I worked all year for this tax return. I deserve to get my nipples pierced.
I hate college football. It's really fucking with our phone sex schedule.
Don't worry dude, I've created a sex logic bomb to stop that sort of thing.
Is it weird that I was turned on when he told me he had a vasectomy?
I knew you two would hit it off
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