i love how cold weather makes identifying sluts easier. is it below freezing? is she wearing a tube top? she's easy.
Oh and fyi, I've been drinking and about to do free weights. I'll late you know how this goes.
Parents weekend was a success.
Yeah, I guess so if you consider being arrested and having your parents bail you out a success...
Bail could have come out of your pocket so yes, I think we were financially responsible this weekend.
It sounds miserable..I have to wear a dress and it's a cash bar?
he's home with a concussion now...but apparently i'm still the highlight of his freshman year
Things bear mace does not do: repel bears. Things bear mace does do: piss off bears, give bystanders asthma attacks. Lesson learned
I've actually, minus lsat night have actually changed my drinking habits
Please brint me miilk. I am on the floor but my door is open. Thank you, i appreciate u verry much.
Hey. My eyes swollen shut and I can't find my shoes. How was your night?
Dude if I call tonight please answer and just say "NO, dont do it."
BAT SHIT CRAZY
It's you're fault, even though I never called
so let me get this straight... she's showing a cameltoe that can be seen from the space station and I'm NOT supposed to stare?
WELP I KNOW THE HAPPY HOUR DRINKS WERE GOOD BECAUSE MOM JUST INFORMED ME I AM THE RESULT OF POKED HOLE IN THE DIAPHRAGM
I really regret not asking “like a cupcake” when you asked me to eat your ass
all i remember is arguing with the chick that yahoo was better than google
all you were doing was yelling YAHOOOOO in her face
so i won
My son's girlfriend just thanked me for having good penis genes.
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