Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
So then the officer asked you how you were getting home and you told him "very carefully"
just fought my dog for the chicken pie I dropped on the floor.
I head back to the dorms in less than a week I'm not ready to see my roomate naked that much again.
I think I'm drunk. That wine was old. I found it behind the water heater next to the mouse poison.
I can't feel my brain.
Bachelor party turned 19 hour search and rescue in the mountains. nbd
oh, i've got big weekend plans. on an unrelated note, do you think viagra will work if the guy is roofied?
nothing like a walk of shame in front of a cnn news crew to start the morning off right
I remember saying to him "Fun fact! If you lie this way it's easier to deep throat!" I even judge me.
Just got stuck in an elevator on campus with a ton of British guys. My pants almost pulled themselves down.
Her mom came down to the basement and took shots with us. She's now passed out in a wheel barrow. This party got weird
Sometimes at I wake up from a dead sleep at 1am and call the bar just to hear the clink of the glasses and the pouring of the beer on tap in the backround
I threw my shoes out of frustration and walked home barefoot... can you help me find my shoes in the morning
Coffee and girl scout cookies. Breakfast of champions.
Get fucked.
We need to stop calling him that. I definitely said “Fuck me harder Swizzle Dick“ while we were doing it and it got weird
He should appreciate that I recommend that corkscrew cock of his! I’m getting him laid
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