even in my darkest moments, having another person eat my jizz would make me smile
She just got back from rehab. You dont celebrate that with margaritas.
im sorry, I just can't fuck a guy who can't receive picture messages
we decided to do a scavenge hunt for ourself for when we walked back to our apartments. We hid taco bell behind some bushes. I think they are still good.
i'm not accepting baked goods from anyone for awhile. especially after the stalker pie.
Coming out of the blackout mid beej was nice. Seeing her face was not.
Ok seriously I'm living off of bologna but I have 4 handles in the freezer.
I blew him and did charles barkley impressions at the same time. what a pro
Dilemas of the modern woman: deciding whether or not to write on your ex's wall for his birthday. This is serious.
That all sounds beautiful. All I have to offer is my shining personality, extensive amounts of space knowledge, and I hear I am pretty not sucky at sucking dick
ill be home in an hour. Be in my bed ready for disappointment
He makes balloon animals that get you high? Hell yeah invite him over!
if they didn't want us to do blow at uni, why would they make textbooks so smooth?
I told him that he could either pay the 10 dollars for the box of condoms or I'll make him pay for the diapers.
Get your dick back in here. On Saturdays, you're not allowed to leave my bed unless it's to make me bacon or coffee.
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