He was from Iceland of course I didnt sleep with him, havent you seen Mighty Ducks 2???
He just sent me a dick pic with his iPod held up next to it and the words "in relation to iPod." Geekiest booty call ever.
We got a party bus for the nite. I found out the hard way why stripper poles are meant for girls.
So there is a guy driving a robot around the college of engineering selling energy drinks
Just saying. If you end up in canada tomorrow morning at least youll have my text to remind you how it happened
Just a heads up. Everytime I get arrested in Maine I claim I lost my ID and use your name.
The gym has a pool
my gym membership just went from "way to get in shape" to "place to go swim when I'm high"
He asked me to spit in his mouth. I did. Never let me hook up with this guy again.
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
You work today? I woke up with a raging boner that was whispering your name
You texted me the words "butt stuff" 53 times in a four hour period last night.
Just put on slippers before underwear so you know where my priorities are
The first thing I did when I got to the apartment was masturbate on the couch
You said, "I'll have this whole island inside of you by 6 AM. Just point out who you want and I'll make it happen."
After 2 minutes he came and said, "thanks for everything". I can't wait to hear what he says next time when I do more than just lay there.
Randomize
