What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
I got into my dads silver toyota in the back seat to get picked up and 2 mins later I asked my dad when are we leaving, then an old mexican woman turned around. wrong toyota I'm guessing.
In hindsight, trust falling your grandma was a bad idea. Sorry about that.
come back what if one of your parents walks in and im just sitting here eating a cheesesteak without you
New development. Drinking at work is so easy and awesome I might have to do it everyday.
Her hair goes down to her lower back and nobody was there to held it back for her. She looked like chewbacca dipped in vomit.
Just saw a guy walking down the street carrying a giant inflatable penis
Just arrived at our party
I think the fact that I shit my pants, threw away my underwear in a frat bathroom, lost my socks down a drain in the front yard and still got laid... deserves some sort of a victory drink for myself or a blowjob for him since he was such a good sport.
You challenged yourself to walk backwards all the way to the bar... And you did
Why is it so hot and why are these the only pants in my life.
Hey dude. I've got a mini fridge in my closet now so we don't have to worry about getting drunk and falling down the stairs on our way to get more beer.
I think I got a sinus infection from puking out my nose on st. Patricks day #thisis26
Only in this town do you have a bridesmaid shortage due to pregnancies.
Dont be alarmed when you come homeand see a guy handcuffed to your bed. His name is james. Ill uncuff him when I get home
If you were to to ask if I just hid 4 shooters or Jameson it my bra and panties the anwer would be yes, yes I did
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