So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
I love hooters. This dumb bartender is saying how coffee dehydrates you so that's why she sometimes just eats the coffee grinds wake up.
yeah so i didn't even realize i was on meth until the next morning
i yelled out "tuesday" during orgasim. he fucked me into 2 days from now.
the weed was in a baggy that had little penguins on it. i am so excited you have no idea
eating kraft dinner with my face. no forks.
Has now officially visited every ER in this city in one semester.
running the faucet water is not hiding the sound of you vomiting. fyi.
drunk guy next to me on the train just tried to share his pizza with me
he just tried to feed it to me...i love new york
Just pretend you're riding a unicorn through space. Thats how I deal with the stirrup situation at the gyno office.
I got pushed into some bald man in the pit and spent the next few minutes with my face against his head. Man I love ecstasy.
Every time I someone I meet again from that wedding it turns into the "Oh your the guy who puked in the hallway and passed out in front of the elevator."
Dad's teaching me to make moonshine this weekend as "college prep". How scared should I be sis?
His wedding band got caught on my nipple ring and that's how I realized he was married
See I just want a dick that I don`t have to deal with or talk to unless it is inside me. Is that so much to ask for?
Randomize