he said i was weird because i want to have sex in public places.
i dont think thats weird i think thats fun
i forgot to tell you, he fell asleep outside my house again last night, but im weird
he was fingering me to the beat of a lady gaga song. new high? new low? i don know, but i came, so whatever.
Woke up in a closet. I'm not drinking till summer.
she passed on me to fuck the foreign guy. is there a manlier, slightly less gay way of saying "always the bridesmaid, never the bride"?
nope.
I just saw a girl walking up the hill with a little red wagon full of booze... I want to be in her study group.
I decided to have standards now that i've graduated. No guys without a bed frame.
Would nail polish remover take gorilla glue off my nipples? We had a strange night.
I woke up this morning with a sharpie tramp stamp. Pretty sure it's a picture of a squirrel.
DON'T WEAR PANTS.
I REPEAT.
DO. NOT. WEAR. TROUSERS.
But seriously I don't know. I haven't seen her since I gave her back her 3 blind mice stick, and she just started hitting everybody with it.
His name was Kyle but I insisted on calling him baby Jesus all night and then we did a line and he bought me Taco Bell so idk
So I had sex in the woods today. Anything else that happened today? Irrelevant. It was a GOOD day.
I would like to reiterate that I went to give lessons and ended up having a three way instead
Not going to lie, when I looked in the tub I expected to see what might have been remnants of a squirrel.
I got some blow and a hand job from one of the strippers. So I guess I'm getting over the divorce.
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