I just peed or puked all or around my parjibgb lot.
parking. I am not drunk
1 of the best things of being a business owner is I don't get fired for having sex in the office
In other news I saw a pack of make believe zombies walking down green st.
gotta love wednesdays
How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
Dude. My sister is off limits. Touch her again and I'll rip off your dick and force feed it to you.
I accept this challenge.
I'm 2 blowjobs away from girlfriend status....don't tell me I don't know how to have an adult relationship
Ive been home for 20 minutes and I'm already in bed with a vodka tonic
I think we should roll her a welcome back, sorry your godmom's on life support blunt.
Oh my god what did I do. My hands are scraped, there are pickles on the floor, my clothes are wet, and I don't remember how I get here. Thank you.
See what happens chris. I told u not to invite her over. Now shes on her way to jail and were stuck with two pomeranians.
Do you know how many guys' fantasies I've been told I'm a part of lately?!
Just 2. But still.
I found it. now I'm going to the gym to be "healthy" or whatever that folklore is called.
I lose my morals, my dignity, and my selfie stick :(
I got my period today and I cried tears of joy. And then just cried because my cramps are actually killing me from the inside out.
I'm kinda sad I'm leaving the bank. I never got to have rough sex in the vault.
Randomize
