In a few years, 50 babies 50 states. Like it?
i just realized that the oil change sticker on my windshield is a day before the last time i had sex. I've driven exactly 10500 miles since.
you need to get laid.. and an oil change.
You told him you loved him!?
I mean if he translated "Zi luve ku" as that then yes.
We've been broken up for 7 months. His mom sent me a card with a brochure inside titled "How at Risk for STD's are you?"
She gives pretty bad head, but when it's in her dad's Lexus SUV it's tough to complain.
There is a mirror in the headboard of the bed that I'm sleeping in so I can immediately question life choices when I wake up.
The background of my phone is you taped to the wall wearing a cowboy hat
Give him a trash can and a welcome home balloon, he will be good.
Well last time he got out of rehab he lasted 6 hours. So 3 days this time is quite an accomplishment.
Februarys looking very promising in the vaginal department
Unless you've also woken up wearing a poncho and a ring pop, I suggest you don't judge me. Okay, I even judged myself for that.
He told me "it wants a kiss" WHY HAS THIS HAPPENED WITH 2 DIFFERENT PEOPLE.
Hey can you text me Heidi's phone number. I just stapled her mattress to the wall and I want to send her a picture of it.
But like now I know, men who are vegetarians are significantly worse in bed.
So the revenge porn my ex posted just resulted in a contract with a gay porn company. I'm going to make $8,000 this weekend. That would a breakup checkmate. Are you joining me in the legislative committee hearing tomorrow?
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