He's spent his last 3 years working at Urban Outfitters. No, I'm not sad I missed out on a life of mustaches, the dollar menu and shitty scarves.
Without me, you would never be able to say you partied with a midget!
I just put up a picture on my dorm room wall of that ginger you hooked up with to remind myself that everyone makes mistakes
I wonder if i could put a dildo on my bike seat to encourage me to exercise.
They kept trying to slap each other but they were poring beer onto their hands first referring to it as their baby powder
I don't fucking care about the convenience of not having freudian slips. I spent 2009-2011 screwing around with 3 different Daniels. 2012 WILL be the dawn of a new day
How about a mike?
Already had two of those
Do you have any pictures of me mounting animals that aren't on Facebook?
I swear to god, my hangover cure is a green tea and a 15 minute twerkout. works every time
I'm kinda surprised he wouldn't be honored to take me back as a fuck buddy.
never planned on seeing last weekend's one night stand again, much less be on the same plane as him..
i wasnt sure i had a crush on her until i woke up this morning and saw i had googled fifteen variations of "lesbian marriage in estonia". where the fuck is estonia
I guess you never know how much of an impact you have on someone until you sleep with their cousin
She just kept screaming and saying "fucking you is like fucking a mountain"
I had to cum in my sink.
Can I send you a random dick pic? It's got a lightsaber tattoo
Randomize
