The tricky part is not getting sand in any orifices. Or is the plural orifi? Orifi don't, we'll both be unhappy...
I just saw a girl in Albersons in spandex and curlers buying PBR. Only PBR.
what date should I let him know how fucked up I am?
What I dont get, is for a man with a penis his size, to choose to go back with another girl instead of one that he says is the best sex he's ever had. He cant afford to be picky.
She tried to cook Velveeta IN the oven on clean mode.
My mouth holds just enough water for my bong
I tried exercising today. I ended up masturbating to the Wii fit trainer.
I am going to be fat forever.
Did I mention I should never take 5 Xanax and drink?
I sort of figured that out when I found you sitting on the roof of your house saying we could get in through the skylight while I called the locksmith.
Well, remember that night we took shrooms at graces an had to leave immediately to go home and hold each other on the futon and sob for four hours? That bad...
I still can't believe that I ate McDonald's off of my chest in his bed...
Cross faded me is not the classiest.
No not at all haha I wish there was a picture of that
I fucking hate tequila. Tequila makes me hate pants.
Still can’t get over the fact that we ate beef jerky off a strip club floor
He is saved in her phone as Sir. Mindfuck <3/ vag cleaner of course I need to meet him.
cinco de mayo stole my toenail
cinco de mayo stole my virginity.
She's the other freshman on this drunken voyage
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