I'm about two and a half drinks away from gay.
I'm coming over.
I was scared of Debbie's boobs today. They were all huge and scary looking
there is nothing more satisfying than playing sudoku while pooping
i'll prob lay in bed. its weird not having to track my wallet down, its become such a weekly habit. i suddenly have so much free time
the cop didnt laugh with me when he patted me down and pulled out my flask.
It was perfect I came I passed out in his comfortable bed then a glass of jack Daniels fell from the bed post and spilled all over my face
Well, I looked over and you and him were each making out with a fireman. And then you switched. And you probably spent an hour like that.
He crawled over to me grabbed my boob asked me if I liked cats and then passed out. If that's really my RA, it's gonna be a long year
So the guy I hooked up with during welcome week just tried to booty call me from across the lecture hall at 9am. I don't think he gets how this works...
All I remember is while we were making out M.A.A.D City came on so I pushed him off of me so I could rap along.
You kept ripping all your clothes off and saying, "Let me be free!"
You can trust me. I'm unemployed and not wearing pants.
What do you mean? Just eat his food and have sex with him. Unless you want a relationship, then just eat his food.
also. got fucked to usher last night. dunno if thats a new high or a new low
Was it at least a good usher song?
I'm not trying to analyze you I'm just saying you are being unfair to soup
Randomize
