Reminder- he's a douche bag. A big one.
so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
I think I deserve the nobel peace prize for discovering that one should smoke before drinking instead of drinking before smoking.
she looks like stephen colbert with that blond wig he was wearing last night.
i would think by now you'd realize that my penis does whatever the fuck it wants and i have no control over the situation
For the record, saying you're friends with the owner doesn't work when the owner is the one throwing you out.
EVERYONE CAN HEAR YOU FUCKING YOU ARE IN A TENT
Don't be alarmed at the kitchen mess. I had to shoot the fire extinguisher on the toaster oven, one quick blast. It was a matter of safe over sorry.
I think that's mostly how we became friends.
Well that, and your desire to put your penis in me.
I got punched in the face by a Cowboy last night. Then he bought me a beer cause o convinced security not to kick him out the bar. Start of a fairytale love story? I think so.
okay. well, yeah. i'm a mess and a half. this shit is not what dumbledore died for.
You rope them in with the looks and the boobs, and I'll bore them into submission with random trivia. We can't lose.
Can I pee and smoke my bong at the same time or is that like eating on the toilet
is caitlin alive?
ya she's alive she's watching a movie
ok remind her she drank toilet water then.
I lysoled the money\n(631): wrong text lmao
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