I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
highlight of my day: just saw a crying girl get dropped off at home wearing only socks, booty shorts, and a dirty wifebeeter. I wonder what happened to the costume...
Ah, the precious few moments between when i wake up and when i realize why i'm sleeping on a treadmill.
I'm quitting my job and I'm just going to become a professional drunk girls mistake.
Fucking him was like shopping for my first training bra.. Embarrassing yet extremely useful
I am thinkingif I am doing snow Angels in your living room, I probably had too much to drink
One good thing out of all this is her ass is huge. Like Australia Big.
He's getting off drug court. We're doing a super-blunt with 50 dollars worth stuffed inside. He almost cried tears of joy when we told him.
His grandpa picked him up. Brought him to the house. And made him clean the puke off the driveway with a broom and a bucket of water.
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
lonely sunday drunk me decided to tweeze my pubes. HORRIBLE IDEA
This is the fourth day in a row I woke up with cheetos spread around me in a ritual pattern..this weed is unreal
Nothing warms my heart more than the sight of a naked hockey player in my bed.
i just cleaned my bong... I do not feel healthy
Lessons learned from last night: do not leave me drunk and alone with strippers and a credit card. Let's do whatever's cheaper.
Randomize
