He muttered something about having just washed he sheets, then demanded I give him all my quarters.
when a 14 year old is judging you, you know you've had too much to drink
dude i need to stop getting high. i cant afford to eat like this...
I hope no one at work will be able to read the "who wants body shots" on my chest. I forgot about it.
How in the hell did I take a shot of whiskey to the eyeball last night?
Hickies on top of my hickies. I need a leash and/or a positive female role model
He gave me four orgasms and I kept yelling "Thank you!" and he kept replying, "My pleasure!"
Midwestern nice.
Somehow those two combined like captain planet and shit went haywire
We did shots with the Tupperware consultant last night. I'd say the night was a success.
I woke up to realize my keys were on the front porch. Also so was I. So close yet so far
stop fucking thinking about him when there is A MILLION OTHER PENISES TO RIDE IN THE WORLD
He asked if I had any questions. Apparently, "how thick is the stick up your ass" was not a correct question.
Wtf is this place? I don't see any alcohol and I feel like we were supposed to bring our own strippers.
soo... how was my night?
how goes living off caffiene and alcohol?
i may have recently shit my pants. on two separate occasions.
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