wake up i wanna do it froggy style
I cant believe you went over there and fucked her last night after everything you said
she invited me over to play the wii, it's not like i intended to
You KNEW her power was out...
I am going to invent a chocolate mix for sperm.
i feel like my life has become an afroman song and idk whether i should be sad about that or not
i was so blacked out at my family party.. my mom gave markers to all my little cousins. i was tagged by 5 year olds.
Sometimes to bang a cougar u gotta play wii With her kids
my grandma just put on bowling shoes, to play wii bowling.
Wake and baked to watch the boston marathon. God I love massachusetts
I am not one to point fingers but since it says your name "wuz here" next to the dick drawn on my stomach I am holding you personally responsible.
you know it's time to start studying when you've procrastinated to the point where you're reading your roommate's ex-boyfriend's wall posts from 2006.
Just faked two orgasms bc I had too much wine and remembered mid sex that I bought doritos yesterday.
If I get there and all he has for my big valentines surprise is his body, I'm dumping his ass and posting his dirty pictures on a porn site so people can laugh at him.
I mean. I'm excited for the Seahawks too. I just love nachos.
He lured me round with the prospect of sex and then made me proofread his CV and spoon. I fucking hate this guy.
he came over last night and we fucked with the great british baking show on in the background. it was beautiful
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